I'm not calling for a second chance
by mels2001
Summary: Brittany and Santana broke up two years after Brittany's graduation. Now Brittany is professional dancer touring around the world and Santana is a lawyer in long term relationship with another girl. They are still best friends but do they want or can have their past relationship back? Canon up to 4x20. There's no MIT. Brittana.
1. Chapter 1

**Couldn't help myself! This story was on my mind long enough and since I'm putting RUINS on the hold then it's the perfect timing to start it.**

**I hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

**Chapter 1: How did this happen?**

"_One, two, three, flip, turn, left, right, how is this happening, four, turn, how did I ever let things go that far?, left, right, arabesque, one, two, oh why the others are in three, damn it I missed a step, jesus she fucked up my mind, flip, oh, oh oh why I'm in the air, oh is it in now? Is it not? In what position I'm supposed to land, fuck this is so quick, I need to grab som…." CRACK!_

_An arena with 50 thousand people just stopped breathing. Music stopped playing. There were three horrifying seconds where in a sea of people not even a hair was moving. Only her. Brittany._

**BRITTANY:** Oh! Oooooohhhhh! Fuuuck!

_She was screaming in pain. She was in a pain she'd never experienced before. Was it coming from her mind, her heart, or her leg that now was broken and dislocated? People rushed over to her panicking. She quickly let herself lose consciousness because she thought that was the best thing to do at that time. _

* * *

_Santana was sitting on the couch reading from her iPad. She was still wearing her pjs. Leslie entered the living room, spotted Santana and sighed in frustration._

**LESLIE**: Oh come on, Sanny! Everyone will be here in half an hour. Go get ready, please!

**SANTANA**: _(answers without looking at her) _I will...

**LESLIE:** Go get ready now!

**SANTANA:** I will, baby, relax!

**LESLIE:** Aren't you anxious at all?

**SANTANA:** For what? That I'm going to see a bunch of people, I see almost everyday for the last ten years? No!

**LESLIE:** No. No about that. You know what I mean.

**SANTANA:** _(she looks at her with a loving smile)_ I know, baby. No, I'm not anxious. I'm happy and I can't wait. And I know they are going to be happy too.

_And with that she stood up and got closer to Leslie. She kissed her gently on her lips. Leslie hugged Santana tightly. Leslie was a beautiful girl also latina and at the same height with Santana, 28 years old. She was a lawyer like Santana and they were working together at the same firm. They'd been together the last five years and they were living together in NY. _

**SANTANA:** _(she whispered in Leslie's ear)_ I'm going to get ready. Ok?

**LESLIE:** Thanks.

_Half an hour later, Leslie and Santana were preparing snacks. They were waiting for Quinn, Tina, Rachel, Mercedes and Kurt to come and to announce them their big news. _

_Everyone was now living in New York. Tina was a music teacher in elementary school, newlywed with Mike who was a professional dancer. Mercedes was finally about to release her first record. Rachel was a Broadway star already, about to marry Finn who was also a teacher. Quinn was a theatre and music reporter and critic and she sometimes had roles in small movies or she was doing back up voice for Mercedes. Kurt was a clothes designer, very successful already. He was still with Blaine who was a doctor but he had also a band with Sam and Puck. Sam and Puck were working as professional musicians for several artists._

_After a while everyone had come and they were sitting and chatting. Suddenly Tina remembered something and her face took an expression of terror._

**TINA:** Oh my god I totally forgot it! Have any of you had any news from Brittany?

_Everyone turned to Santana. Santana felt strangely worried._

**SANTANA:** Uunm She's doing the European tour with Celine Dion. You should know that. She's with Mike. I spoke to her two days ago.

_Tina now seems even more terrified._

TINA: So you don't know? _(She looked at the accidents)_ Any of you?

_Everyone shook their heads being visibly worried._

**SANTANA:** _(she was now really worried)_ Know what?

**TINA:** Uuummm... Brittany had an accident in her last show. That would be in European time somewhere around 9 pm today when we were having 2 pm. Now it's probably 2 am there. So the accident probably happened five hours ago. _(They were looking her shocked unable to move or say anything.)_ Didn't you hear the news or saw the posts in twitter. I mean it's still trending worldwide. The concert was stopped. She... Hmmm... She broke her leg. She's in the hospital in Italy.

_Santana stood up as if she's been hit by a lighting. All the others pulled out their phones and checked the news. Posts from every source were coming rapidly. _

**SANTANA:** What are you saying? That can't be true!

**TINA:** I've spoken to Mike a little while ago. I'm sorry Santana I thought you knew.

_Santana was pacing around the living room with tears running her cheeks._

**SANTANA:** I can't believe it. I really can't.

_Leslie went over to her and hugged her._

**LESLIE:** Relax, Sanny. Please, calm down.

**QUINN:** Guys… there's a video… They've uploaded it.

**RACHEL:** I don't know if I can see it.

**SANTANA:** Let me see it.

**LESLIE:** Santana, I don't think that's a good idea.

**SANTANA:** _(She looked angrily over to Leslie.)_ I will.

_They all gathered together and saw the video. The moment Brittany fell from Mike's hands doing an opposite flip everyone screamed. They were crying._

**MERCEDES:** Oh my god baby girl what happened!

**KURT:** Jesus, Britt…

**SANTANA:** I'm going to call her.

* * *

_Mike was pacing around the hospital room. He was furious and was yelling at Brittany who was lying on the hospital bed with her leg uplifted with plaster cast around it. She was staring outside the window with a calm expression on her face not giving much attention to Mike. _

**MIKE:** How did this happened, Brittany? How did this fucking happen? You are one of the best dancers! We, together, taught ourselves this fucking move in junior year for Valerie, how could you make it wrong? How could you miss a step? We've been doing this together for ten years now. Stop staring the window and answer me!

_That moment Brittany's phone rang. Brittany turned slowly her head over the phone. Mike grabbed the phone._

**MIKE:** It's Santana.

_Brittany smiled and nod._

**BRITTANY:** That took her long. Give it to me. _(She pressed the button and answered the phone) _Hey, Santana? What's up?

_**SANTANA:**__ Brittany, cut the crap! Don't play all innocent on me? How did this happen?_

**BRITTANY:** Everyone keeps asking that. Even Celine Dion asked me. If I knew, it wouldn't have happened. _(She was staring at Mike at that last part but Mike waved furiously at her.)_

_**SANTANA:**__ Brittany, you are talking to me now. You are not the one missing steps._

**BRITTANY:** Santana, are you implying that I hurt myself on purpose? Cause that's really weird!

_**SANTANA:**__ (She sighed) No of course not. Look… Sorry… I'm really worried. I just heard it._

**BRITTANY:** _(She smiled)_ Don't worry. I'll be good as new in no time ok?

_**SANTANA:**__ Do you want me to come?_

**BRITTANY:** Where? In Italy? Of course not. I have Mike. Don't worry. When the doctors say it's ok, I'm flying back home.

_**SANTANA:**__ Are you sure?_

**BRITTANY:** Totes! Give kisses to everyone and Leslie, ok?

_**SANTANA:**__ Ok… (She was whispering) Brittany…_

**BRITTANY:** _(She softened her voice)_ I'll call you tomorrow. Pinkie promise!

_**SANTANA:**__ Fine… bye I guess…_

**BRITTANY:** Bye, homegirl!

_Brittany hung up the phone and took a deep breath. She turned her head over the window again with a newly added sad expression over her face._

* * *

_Santana hung up the phone and sighed._

**LESLIE:** Don't be sad, baby. She'll be ok. Once she's back we are going to pamper her all the way. Heck that we will be the first time we are going to see her for so long.

_Santana was thankful for her girlfriend and her sweet words that calmed her worry._

**QUINN:** We'll call her tomorrow too.

**KURT:** Girls, I think you owe us some news.

**TINA:** Did you win the lottery?

**SANTANA:** Well even though the mood was crashed over the news, let's try to bring it back.

**LESLIE:** Yes! We gathered you here today…

**SANTANA:** To announce to you that we are getting married!

_The girls showed their rings and after an awkward pause from the others that fortunately only Santana noticed, her friends jumped up in excitement and hugged them._

* * *

**BRITTANY:** She's getting married, Mike. That's what happened.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi! Thank you so much for your warm responce to that fic! Thank you for your reviews follows and favorites.**

**My chapters won't be so small like this one but consider this as part of the previous chapter. I needed to say these things before the next chapter which will be flashbacks.**

**Enjoy!**

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**Chapter 2: Pain**

_Mike was looking at her confused._

**Mike:** Who's getting married? I don't understand.

_She wasn't looking at him._

**Brittany:** Santana. Santana is getting married.

**Mike:** But… but that's great… right? _(Britany turned and looked at him in his eyes. He saw a great deal of hurt inside them)_ I don't understand, Brittany. You've been apart for over five years now.

**Brittany:** That's true…

_She turned away again. Mike didn't know what to say or do. There was an awkward silence between them._

**Mike:** Are you in pain?

**Brittany:** (_She answered immediately)_ Yes. _(She paused)_ Everywhere; for a long time now; my soul, my entire body, my leg. Do you know for how many years I've been dancing without stopping for more than a week? _(He didn't answer)_ For five years. Five whole years without a stop. Yes I'm in a great deal of pain. Where do I live Mike? Where's my home? Do you know? _(He was pausing.)_ If I want to invite you and Tina for a dinner where you would come? Answer me.

**Mike:** _(He answered sincerely realizing the truth.)_ I don't know. You don't have a house.

**Brittany:** Damn straight! Some few things that I've got are still in Santana's apartment in boxes inside a closet in her guest room because I never came back to collect them after we broke up. I come back only for a three days maximum. I sleep in her guestroom. If my break is more than three days I leave quickly for Lima. And don't let me start about Lima. And that's been going on for five whole years. Do you know why?

**Mike:** _(He lowered his eyes realizing the truth and feeling slightly embarrassed for what he said earlier.)_ Because you are still in love with her.

**Brittany:** Damn straight. I'm gonna tell you something. When a relationship starts to take away from you things, you don't end it, you just revise it, you see it from a different perspective. That's what Santana and I did. Santana wanted me but she wanted me physically there with her. Loving her from abroad just wasn't enough for her. I really don't blame her. And I wanted Santana and I wanted to dance also. Believe me when I'm saying that I didn't get to choose between them. I didn't have the time. Everything happened very fast. Our relationship was leaving parts of us unsatisfied I guess. Even from high school. Of course how I would know that. I was always impulsive, doing things without thinking a lot. I paid my price. I paid it as you can see. _(She pointed her leg)_ Santana was always making the decisions between us. She broke up with me the first time, she broke up with me the second time. She found a girlfriend and now she's getting married. I just left and never came back. I never came back to claim her back. I kept giving my self excuses. But right now no excuse is good for me that I left all these years go by without trying to get her back. That I let things get so out of control that she's getting married. _(She paused and took a deep breath)_ I'm sorry Mike. I'm so sorry that I fell. I didn't mean it. I wasn't focused. I was thinking of her. I had just learnt the news. I didn't want to get myself hurt and that aches more than Santana's marriage; because now I'm stuck and I can't go away dancing around the world. I will be stuck on a bed thinking of her. Probably having her fussing around my head. And really I can't stand her presence more than three days. That's my limit. I think I have never ever spoken for that long in my life. I'm tired. Don't pull yourself out of the tour for me please. I'll hire a nurse don't worry and when I get the all clear I'm flying back to Lima. I'll talk to the production I'll just tell them that I had stomach issues and I got dizzy. Go now, Mike. I'm exhausted. Thank you for everything.

_Mike stood up. His eyes were full of tears. He got closer to her and hugged her._

**Mike:** I love you my friend I'll always be at your side.

**Brittany:** Me too, buddy. Goodnight.

**Mike:** Goodnight, Britt.

_And with that he left. Brittany left alone in the hospital room in a European country far away from home and let her mind pulled down to the memory lane. _


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you all so very much! Your responce was amazing!**

* * *

**Chapter 3: Flashbacks**

_**6 years ago**_

_Brittany was carrying her baggage through the streets of NY. She was totally lost but totally excited. She was talking to herself. "Come on Brittany, you can do it. You can find the place. Blaine Warbler drew you the best map. He even put some glitter on it. How cute is my NY map!" And she kept wondering around for hours with her hands full of bags, cups of coffee, donuts. At some point she sat on a pavement defeated. "So much for surprise… I guess I should call someone to come and get me. It's getting late." But then she saw someone; a familiar figure. "Oh that's Kurt, isn't he? He must be him. Come on, Britt." She lifted her things and followed Kurt who was entering a building. "Yes! This is the place! I actually found it by myself. Now I'm waiting for Kurt to go inside and then I knock. I'm a great planner!" Kurt entered his apartment. Brittany waited for another 10 minutes and knocked the door. She heard people talking from inside and footsteps coming closer. "This is it, Britt. Full circle!" The door opened and Brittany saw in front of her Santana; more beautiful than ever. She did come for her but seeing her standing in front of her did surprise her. She was lost at words. Santana's wide eyes weren't helping. Brittany realized at that moment that she didn't really expect to see Santana again even though she was fighting for that all through her second senior year. "Say something, dump!" she told to herself. And the she smiled and spoke the only words that were on her mind._

_**Brittany:**__ Full circle!_

_**Santana:**__ Huh!?_

_Brittany hearing Santana's voice found her strength again. She smiled at Santana._

_**Brittany:**__ Full circle, Santana. Now our distance is about one step._

_Santana blinked for the first time since she opened the door and a single tear fell from her eye._

_**Brittany:**__ Can you handle one step, Santana? 'Cause that will be our distance, one step from each other. _

_**Santana:**__ I… I can handle… one step…_

_Then Brittany dropped her things on the floor and opened her arms._

_**Brittany:**__ Close it then!_

_And with that Santana fell in Brittany's arms. Brittany laughed and lifted her from the ground in a bridal way and entered the apartment screaming._

_**Brittany:**__ I got my girl back! I made it! (Santana was holding her for dear life crying and laughing at the same time) Woohooo! Full circle for Brittany S. Pierce!_

_Rachel and Kurt rushed to see what was happening but the sight in front of them stopped them._

_**Rachel:**__ Brittany!_

_**Kurt:**__ Brittany, what are you doing here?_

_**Brittany:**__ I came to take my girl back._

_She was still holding Santana and she turned her head and kissed her. Santana cried even more with the kiss._

_**Santana:**__ Put me down, Britt. _

_**Brittany:**__ No way! I'm not leaving you! I'm just gonna sit on this couch with you in my arms._

_Brittany sat on the couch with Santana on her lap. Rachel and Kurt gave them some privacy._

_**Santana:**__ You don't know… you can't possibly know… how empty I was… without you… You don't know how I regretted leaving you behind… you don't know how much I love you._

_**Brittany:**__ I don't regret sending you away. You deserve big things, Santana, and if I'm the one that is keeping you away from them, I will always send you away. But… honey… no one can love you more than I do… even if they try… no one can love you like the way I do… you should remember that._

_**Santana:**__ I know that… I'm not leaving you again, Brittany. For all the things that are worth fighting for… you… us… is the greatest._

_**Brittany:**__ One step, honey… it's only one step._

_They kissed as if the drew life from the contact of their lips._

* * *

_**Eight months later.**_

_Santana was a full NYADA student now and Brittany was taking dancing lessons at a dance school and working in small dance projects around the city._

_It was 6 pm and Brittany was waiting Santana outside her school. A few minutes later Santana came out and Brittany surprised her with a huge hug._

_**Brittany:**__ NYADA's best singer just came out, ladies and gentlemen, and it happens to be one's Brittany S. Pierce's girlfriend! Coincidence? I think not!_

_Santana laughed. Ever since she got back with Brittany she was feeling a constant feeling of happiness and fullness She was feeling like a god, like some super hero who could do just about everything. She was at her best. She was chasing her dream to be a singer and she was actually good at that. And all thanks to Brittany's return, thanks to Brittany's arrival to NY and to her life. "Being in your arms like that Britt just makes me best at everything", she thought while Brittany kissed her._

_**Santana:**__ You are such a dork!_

_**Brittany:**__ And a horny one._

_**Santana:**__ Brittany, stop! People can listen to us!_

_**Brittany:**__ So? You are mine. I can be horny for you._

_**Santana:**__ (She laughed.) Ok ok, stop now._

_**Brittany:**__ (She was leaning to kiss Santana) Stop me…_

_And Santana kissed her passionately. They broke the kiss and started walking._

_**Santana:**__ So how come and you came to pick me up?_

_**Brittany:**__ Oh I have great news. Look! (She took a paper out of her bag.)_

_**Santana:**__ What's this?_

_**Brittany:**__ They asked me to do a tour with some artists. How cool is that right?_

_Santana's heart started beating a little faster._

_**Santana:**__ That's great! Mmm for how long? _

_**Brittany:**__ Two months tops! So what do you say? I should do it?_

_**Santana:**__ Huh… sure… I mean of course, Britt, it's a great opportunity and the money is good._

_**Brittany:**__ So are you ok with that?_

"_Am I?" Santana thought._

_**Santana:**__ (She smiled at Brittany) Of course, Britt. I'm proud of you. _

_**Brittany:**__ I love you, Santana. Thank god I have you._

_**Santana:**__ Thank god I have you too._

_They stopped walking to kiss each other._

_**Santana:**__ So when are you going to leave?_

_**Brittany:**__ In a week._

_Santana felt a pain rushing through her body. She sighed._

_**Brittany:**__ Hey… are you sure you are ok with this?_

_**Santana:**__ I'm sure… but I'll miss you, you know…_

_**Brittany:**__ I'll miss you too. But it's not two months without break. I'll be back for a few days here and there. Maybe you can join me in some cities nearby._

_**Santana:**__ Sure, babe. We'll figure it out._

_**Brittany:**__ (She hugged Santana tightly) Thank you, Santana._

_**Santana:**__ (Santana let a few tears to slip) I have you back in my life it's the least I can do._

* * *

_**2 months later**_

_Brittany was entering the building of her apartment with Santana, she was carrying her bags and she was really tired. She reached her apartment and unlocked the door. She was finally back after a two-month tour. She searched for Santana but she wasn't in the living room. And then she heard her singing. Brittany's heart sank when she listened what Santana was singing. She walked to their bedroom and saw Santana singing and crying._

_**Santana:**__Do you remember we were sitting there by the water?__  
__You put your arm around me for the first time__  
__You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter__  
__You are the best thing that's ever been mine…_

_**Brittany:**__ Why are you singing that song? _

_Her voice came out harsher than she expected but she was terrified. That was what she expected to find by coming back. Not Santana leaving her again? _

_**Santana:**__ Brittany!_

_She wiped her tears and run to hug Brittany, but Brittany didn't hug her back._

_**Brittany:**__ Why are you singing that song, Santana? (Santana continued crying) Are you leaving me?_

_**Santana:**__ No, no. God no! I just missed you. I missed you so much Brittany. I had this feeling again, like last year… I can't stand your absence._

_**Brittany:**__ I missed you too and I hated all these nights away from you… but I knew I love you and you love me and that eased my pain._

_**Santana:**__ I know… I know… I'm sorry… I'm sorry, Brittany…_

_**Brittany:**__ I don't want to hear you singing that song again, ok?_

_**Santana:**__ Ok._

_**Brittany:**__ You are a singer and I'm a dancer. Our jobs have a difficult schedule but we are going to make it. You have to believe it. At the end of the day I'll always be a step away from you._

"_That's not true, my love", Santana thought._

_**Santana:**__ I love you._

_Brittany: And I love you more than anyone can ever love you._

_They kissed and lay on the bed together._

* * *

_**Two months later.**_

_Santana was in a restaurant having dinner with Rachel and Quinn. Brittany entered the restaurant and made her way quickly to the girls' table. The three girls were surprised to see her._

_**Rachel:**__ Britt, I didn't know you would join us!_

_**Brittany:**__ As if I was gonna interrupt sacred pezfaberry time! _

_**Quinn:**__ Nonsense! Sit with us! You are still my favorite. (Quinn winked at Brittany.) _

_**Brittany:**__ Thanks, Q!_

_Santana hadn't spoken up until now. She was feeling something was wrong. It was true. Brittany would never interrupt her weekly dinner with Quinn and Rachel. When she moved to NY she totally respected the bond that Rachel and Santana had made. And Quinn… Quinn was always Santana's best frenemy. So something was wrong._

_**Santana:**__ What's wrong?_

_**Brittany:**__ (She took a deep breath) Well… nothing is wrong… Can we step outside for a minute? I need to ask you something._

_**Santana:**__ We don't have secrets from Rachel and Quinn._

_**Brittany:**__ No, but we have private moments._

_**Quinn:**__ Girls, it's ok. We can go outside._

_**Santana:**__ No, Britt, come on, that's rude._

_**Brittany:**__ Ok here's the thing. I had a proposal… for big job… and I want to ask you if you are ok. I need to answer to them in three hours._

_**Santana:**__ (Her heart start racing) What kind of job?_

_**Brittany:**__ A world tour with Beyonce. Her choreographer asked for me specifically. I mean it's a great honor, isn't it?_

_Santana felt like as if every light in the room turned off. Rachel sensed her discomfort and took her hand. Brittany noticed that and got a little angry._

_**Santana:**__ Of course it is. But… can we have that conversation at home…_

_**Brittany:**__ Santana, I have to give an answer. Do you want me to go or not?_

_**Santana:**__ That's not fair, Brittany. You shouldn't put the burden of your decisions on me. It's your decision to make._

_**Brittany:**__ So do you want me to make that decision without discuss it with you?_

_**Santana:**__ I didn't mean that… but you can't hold me responsible for your decisions._

_**Brittany:**__ Santana… if you can't handle it… I won't go. Simple as that._

_**Santana:**__ I know… but I think it will be more difficult for me to handle the responsibility of holding you back in your career. So… I guess… go for it Britt… we'll figure it out._

_**Brittany:**__ I love you so much, Santana._

_Brittany kissed Santana, said goodbye to the girls and left._

_**Santana:**__ (She hid her face with her hands) I won't make it. I can't breathe._

_**Rachel:**__ Hey calm down. Calm down. It'll be ok._

_**Santana:**__ It won't be. I just got her back and she just keeps leaving. I can't stand it. I can't miss her so much. I can't go through a single day without sharing with her._

_**Quinn:**__ Santana, relax. It's her job, honey. Aren't you proud of her?_

_**Santana:**__ Of course I am… but that's the way it's gonna be? Be in a relationship by myself?_

_**Rachel:**__ You are overreacting. Besides, Brittany is a dancer. She has only a few years ahead of her that she can really dance. Dancers don't dance after thirty usually. You have to be patient. She loves you._

_**Santana:**__ I know… but… when she's gone… life goes on without her and that's so hard…_

_That night Santana was lying on their bed. Brittany joined her._

_**Brittany:**__ You are sad._

_**Santana:**__ I can't help it… but I want you to know that I'm very proud of you._

_**Brittany:**__ Santana, it's just for a little while… just for a little…_

_**Santana:**__ What do you mean?_

_**Brittany:**__ It's just this tour and maybe a couple more if I'm lucky. I just want to experience that, it'll make me a better dancer but I'll stop after those. I'll work here or wherever you are. Please, it's just for a little while._

_**Santana:**__ Do you promise me?_

_**Brittany:**__ I promise you. Be patient with me now and I'll stop touring soon._

_**Santana:**__ I love you so much…_

_**Brittany:**__ I love you too. I will always love you. I'm still your best friend right?_

_**Santana:**__ Always._

* * *

_**Six months later.**_

_Santana was on her bed crying hard. She couldn't breathe; she couldn't stand at her own two feet. That's was going on for the last three months. She was missing classes. She was missing deadlines. She was missing life. The decision that had made this morning ripped her heart, but she couldn't, she just couldn't go on… She took her phone and called Brittany._

_**Brittany:**__ Hey, honey, what's up? (Santana couldn't speak. She was just crying hard) Santana, what's wrong? Something happened? (Santana was saying anything) Santana!_

_**Santana:**__ It's… it's over, Brittany… _

_And with that she cried even harder. Brittany felt like all the blood that was running in her rushed to her ears and beating in them._

_**Brittany:**__ What's over?_

_**Santana:**__ we… we are over…_

_**Brittany:**__ You are kidding me, right?_

_**Santana:**__ No… I can't… I really can't anymore… you knew I couldn't handle it… Why did you come back if you were to leave again?_

_**Brittany:**__ (She was yelling out of fear) Are you shitting me Santana? I thought we've talked about that. I thought you understood._

_**Santana:**__ I did… but I can't… you promised me you would be only one step away._

_**Brittany:**__ (She was crying now) I am… we are together… I'm just working, Santana… I'm not roaming around the world having fun…_

_**Santana:**__ I know… but I'm here alone… living a life that you don't know…_

_**Brittany:**__ Please Santana, don't do that… please give me some time... I have a break in a month… I'll come back…_

_**Santana:**__ I can't… I can't… I love you more than life itself but I can't stand not having you here…_

_**Brittany:**__ Give me some time, Santana… please… wait for me one last time…_

_**Santana:**__ I want you now… now, can you understand it? Can you be here now?_

_**Brittany:**__ I can't, baby…_

_**Santana:**__ It's over Brittany, you promised… one step…_

_**Brittany:**__ You promised to never leave me again…_

_**Santana:**__ I guess we are even…_

_**Brittany:**__ Give me some time…_

_**Santana:**__ I will always love you the most._

_**Brittany:**__ Fuck you Santana, just fuck you…_

_They hang the phone at the same time. They cried their hearts out at the same time. They fainted at the same time._

* * *

_**One month later **_

_Brittany and Santana hadn't spoken to each other for a month. Brittany was functioning like a robot. She didn't return through her break. "Return to whom" she was thinking. Santana was working again hard for her school but it hadn't so much fun as it used to. She was still missing Brittany terribly but now she wasn't waiting for her and that made her pain bearable. She couldn't explain why she was feeling like that but she couldn't denied it either._

* * *

_**One month later.**_

_Brittany had just finished a show. She was exhausted. She returned to her hotel room and threw herself on the bed. Her phone rang and when she saw who was calling she felt an instant pain on her chest._

_**Brittany:**__ Hello…_

_**Santana:**__ Hey, Brittany._

_**Brittany:**__ (Her voice was emotionless) Hi._

_**Santana:**__ Ummm how… how are you?_

_**Brittany:**__ I'm ok…_

_**Santana:**__ Good. So… mmm… I wanted to call you because…_

_**Brittany:**__ Because…?_

_**Santana:**__ (She took a deep breath) Because you are my best friend, Brittany, and I don't want to lose you._

_**Brittany:**__ It's not making any sense._

_**Santana:**__ What?_

_**Brittany:**__ You. You are not making any sense._

_**Santana:**__ Brittany, please. We'll always be best friends…_

_**Brittany:**__ Yes, but right now I'm not ready for that. I haven't get over our break up and frankly I don't know if I'm going to ever get over it._

_**Santana:**__ I'm not over it either. And I miss you terribly… (She hesitated) you didn't came back on your break._

_**Brittany:**__ You shouldn't expect me back since you didn't gave me the time that I've asked you._

_**Santana:**__ I know… (She sighed) but let's be friends, please._

_**Brittany:**__ You are willing to fight for us to be friends but not a couple. And that stings, Santana. Bye._

* * *

_**One month later.**_

_Brittany was lying on her hotel bed staring at ceiling. She was truly unhappy. Her phone rang. It was Santana again. This past month was thinking about being friends with Santana. She couldn't get over her hurt but Santana was right. They couldn't not be in each other's life. She had to manage and be a friend to Santana because she couldn't go on without her. And if Santana wasn't in love with her it didn't matter, she would still try to make her happy. And maybe when the tour was over Santana would want to try and be together again._

_**Brittany:**__ Hello!_

_**Santana:**__ Hello, Brittany?_

_They were trying to sound easy and relaxed._

_**Brittany:**__ How are you, Santana?_

_**Santana:**__ I'm good._

_**Brittany:**__ Cool._

_**Santana:**__ Britt… Please be friends with me again._

_**Brittany:**__ I'm trying._

_**Santana:**__ (She sounded happy) Really?_

_**Brittany:**__ (She smiled) Really._

_**Santana:**__ Thank you! Listen I've got something to tell you._

_**Brittany:**__ Tell me._

_**Santana:**__ So… look… this past month… I've been with someone…_

_**Brittany:**__ Excuse me? _

_Brittany couldn't believe what she was listening._

_**Santana:**__ Please don't get upset. I'm not cheating…_

_**Brittany:**__ You are filling the blank…_

_**Santana:**__ (She sighed) Nobody can fill your absence, Brittany. Nobody will. I'm just trying to start acting like a normal person. _

_**Brittany:**__ (She was cold) What do you want for me now?_

_**Santana:**__ I want you… in my life…_

_**Brittany:**__ Do you think it's easy for me?_

_**Santana:**__ No. But help me… help me go on._

_Brittany took a deep breath and forced a smile._

_**Brittany:**__ Ok, homegirl._

_**Santana:**__ What?_

_**Brittany:**__ (She sounded happy) Besties for life, ok? I'm happy for you, homegirl. I'll call you tomorrow to learn about that chick, ok? _

_**Santana:**__ O..ok… mmmm… I love you._

_**Brittany:**__ Bye, homegirl._

_Brittany hung up the phone. And stay frozen on her bed. There are some feelings and thoughts that can be buried the old Brittany S. Pierce way. And when that happened, people thought that Brittany was stupid, because when Brittany buried things she would become the naïve girl everyone made fun of her. She wouldn't try again ever in her life to win Santana back. She would love her to the dying point but she wouldn't try again. Besties for life is good enough. She picked up her phone and called her management company._

_**Brittany:**__ Hey, Helen!_

_**Helen:**__ Hey Britt! How are you?_

_**Brittany:**__ I'm ok. So listen. The tour is ending in a couple of months. I want you to find me another tour right after this._

_**Helen:**__ Right after? You don't need a break._

_**Brittany:**__ No, no. I don't need a break. I signed the second contract._

_**Helen:**__ Oh… ok. Then I call you in a couple of days. It won't be difficult to find you something, you are starting making a good name in business._

_**Brittany:**__ Cool. Thanks, Helen._

"_Besties for life, Santana, means as far away from you as possible. That's the only way it can be done", Brittany wiped her tears and fell asleep._

* * *

_**Four years later.**_

_Brittany's phone rang. She was taking a shower. She saw Santana's name on the screen and smiled. She answered the phone._

_**Brittany:**__ Hey, homegirl!_

_**Santana:**__ Hey Britt Britt! What's up?_

_**Brittany:**__ Nothing new. I'm just taking a shower._

_**Santana:**__ Wanky!_

_**Brittany:**__ You could say that._

_They laughed._

_**Santana:**__ So listen. I have great news. I want you to be the first to learn about it._

_**Brittany:**__ I'm listening._

_**Santana:**__ Leslie proposed._

_Brittany felt like the entire ceiling was dropped on her head. Her heart had stopped._

_**Santana:**__ Did you hear me?_

_**Brittany:**__ I did._

_**Santana:**__ So? Amazing huh? I'm getting married. Snixx is settling down!_

_**Brittany:**__ How cool is that? Ummm Santana someone is on the door. I'll call you later ok?_

_**Santana:**__ Ok, love you._

_**Brittany:**__ Ok, bye._

_Brittany stayed frozen naked on the bathroom for five hours._

_Santana was noticing again that Brittany didn't say back "I love you". Santana was missing Brittany loving her. She was missing Brittany so much._

* * *

**Present Day **

_Brittany shook her head trying to stop the memories flooding her mind. She was crying. She was feeling so tired, so exhausted. The loneliness of that hospital room was too much to handle. For five years she was trying to avoid Santana, to avoid getting hurt again. But the pain she was feeling now was so much worse. "I may just have to admit that there's no decent life for me away from her… and now it's too late to claim back my life…" She picked up her phone._

_**Helen:**__ Hello!_

**Brittany:** Hey, Helen!

_**Helen:**__ Brittany, oh my god! How are you? We were so sad to hear the news._

**Brittany:** I'm ok, Helen, don't worry.

_**Helen:**__ Are you still in Italy?_

**Brittany:** Yup. So listen. I guess I'm staying off for a year to heal properly.

_**Helen:**__ Of course._

**Brittany:** I want you to find me something based on NY for the next year.

_**Helen:**__ Are you serious?_

**Brittany:** Yes. I don't care if it's something big or not. Just a job in NY, ok?

_**Helen:**__ Ok, Britt. Your contract is about to expire anyway so you can change it._

**Brittany:** Cool.

_**Helen:**__ I'll call you when I have news for you._

**Brittany:** Thanks, girl.

_Brittany hung up the phone and closed her eyes. Tears streamed down her face._


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you everyone for your reviews and follows!**

* * *

**Chapter 4: Three days**

_Brittany was lying on the hospital bed looking outside the window. She tried to be really still and calm. Her already back pain wasn't letting her to completely relax but she was already deep in her thoughts when her doctor came in. She turned and smile at him._

**Dr. Sadiny:** Good morning, Brittany.

**Brittany:** Buon giorno!

_She laughed at herself._

**Dr. Sadiny:** Very good!

**Brittany:** See, I'm a fast learner.

**Dr. Sadiny:** I see that. And you are healing fast too.

**Brittany:** Really?

**Dr. Sadiny:** Yes. You can be released today…

**Brittany:** _(She got really excited)_ That's perfect!

**Dr. Sadiny:** (_He stopped her)_ But… you have a long road ahead of you. Your healing process has just begun. So you have two months ahead of you in the plaster cast.

**Brittany:** Two months? That long?

**Dr. Sadiny:** Well you are dancer… do you want it back or not?

**Brittany:** I certainly do.

**Dr. Sadiny:** I don't recommend surgery on your knee just yet. You have to do a lot of physiotherapy; months of physiotherapy to bring your leg back to its previous state. Now, a normal person wouldn't need a surgery at all, maybe at an older age and if they'd experience balance problems. But for a dancer like you, rupture of the posterior cruciate ligament can affect your ability to dance. So, at a later state I recommend you to have your knee checked on an orthopaedist specialised in dancers.

**Brittany:** Is that all?

**Dr. Sadiny:** Yes. You need to rest your leg and absolutely not walk on it these next few months. Other than that you are free to go.

**Brittany:** Thanks a lot. Thanks for everything, doctor. I owe you.

**Dr. Sadiny:** You owe me nothing. But there's a small favour I need.

**Brittany:** Anything.

Dr. Sadiny: My daughter, she's 13, was on the show the day you got injured. She was really devastated. She wants to be a dancer too and seeing you hurt like that shocked her. She actually is a great fan of yours.

**Brittany:** Fan of mine? Well that's a first! We back up dancers don't get to have fans.

**Dr. Sadiny:** Well you do. So can you sign me an autograph for her?

**Brittany:** Of course. But why don't you bring her here to meet me?

**Dr. Sadiny:** I could do that. You'll be still here around 4pm?

**Brittany:** Sure. I can't just leave. I need to find someone to help me with papers and flights and stuff.

**Dr. Sadiny:** Do you need something from us?

**Brittany:** No, no. I'll call our tour manger or I'll just fly over my parents to come and pick me. But please bring your daughter to meet me.

**Dr. Sadiny:** Ok, Brittany, see you at 4 pm.

_The doctor left the room and silence fell again upon Brittany; although, the conversation with the doctor did cheer her up. But she should find someone to help her go back home and she wasn't used to ask for help for anything; especially after her final break up with Santana, she left and never asked for someone's aid. Her thoughts were once again interrupted by the arrival of the tour manager, Mr. Smith. He entered the room with a smile and went over and gave her a hug. She sat beside her and took her hand in his._

**Mr. Smith:** How are you, sweetie?

**Brittany:** I'm good actually. I get to be released today.

**Mr. Smith:** That's perfect. Listen I'm here to have you sign some papers and help you go back.

**Brittany:** Oh that's not necessary. It was my fault anyway and it did affect the show. I had stomach issues but I danced anyway so I got dizzy and…

**Mr. Smith:** Brittany… we were more than happy to have you in our team. You are one of the best in business and we appreciate your devotion to our show. Celine will cover all the hospital charges and you'll go back home with her private plane.

**Brittany:** _(She lowers her head)_ I can't accept that…

**Mr. Smith:** Please do. Your place will always be open amongst Celine's dancers.

**Brittany:** Thank you… it really means a lot…

**Mr. Smith:** So the plane will be here tomorrow I'm going to discharge you right away and I'll come back tomorrow to get you.

**Brittany:** Thank you so much.

_Mr Smith started to leave but then remembered something and turned back._

**Mr. Smith:** You are going back to NY right?

**Brittany:** Ummm no… I'm actually going back to Lima, Ohio.

**Mr. Smith:** Ok! Have someone to pick you up from there.

_Mr. Smith left and Brittany fell to her comfortable silence again. She checked her watch. It was 12pm so that meant that it was 5 am in NY. It was too early to call Santana to tell her the news. She closed her eyes and let herself go down the memory lane. She was used to do that the endless hours on tour buses, flights, hotels. Her life had become a mobile loneliness. She suddenly felt nervous about being back and for so long. She loved and missed everyone, her parents, her friends, Santana, but she learnt to live away from them. She kept their memory alive inside her to keep her company, to keep her grounded, to feel like she has a home somewhere, but she didn't know how to live with them anymore. She didn't know who they grew up to be. And then she thought of Santana again. She was still so in love with her. She still loved her so much but right now she was just wondering if deliberately didn't let her self to get over Santana out of fear or loneliness or obsession? She couldn't tell. She couldn't tell anything anymore. Her life the last five years was focused on her trying to get away. But now she was forced to stay still and meet these people again. She was so afraid. She was so in love with Santana but with the Santana that she'd lost and she didn't know if Santana now was the same Santana with the one she grew up with and loved. "Things can turn good or bad. There are only two options really. So what's to scare about?", she thought and fell asleep._

* * *

_It was around 6pm and Santana and Leslie returned home from work both exhausted. Santana threw herself on the sofa. Leslie headed to the kitchen to make a snack._

**Leslie:** What do you want for dinner?

**Santana:** Whatever you want I'm fine.

**Leslie:** 'k..

_Santana pulled her phone to check her calls. "Nothing from Britt", she thought. That was regularity from her. She would always check her phone and make the same thought if there wasn't a missed call from Brittany._

_Leslie came back to the living room with a box. She sat next to Santana._

**Leslie:** Look, I've found this perfect place that they make wedding invitations and they are just so cute and funny and unique. I took some samples to check them together, what do you say?

**Santana:** Ummm sure… but isn't it a little too early?

_Santana always wanted to avoid conversation about the wedding but she couldn't understand why._

**Leslie:** Well I know we haven't set a date yet but… when I proposed I didn't plan to stay engaged two years. I mean… why should we wait? We are already five years together.

_She kissed Santana and smiled._

**Santana:** Yes, of course… but… look… I'm really stressed with Brittany's injury… I mean I want to treat her and help her… so…

**Leslie:** I understand that but why that would have to postpone the wedding?

**Santana:** She can even walk… I mean... I want her of course in the wedding…

_Leslie started to get irritated._

**Leslie:** And I want her too but I can't see the reason why a person that is not even present in our lives gets to affect our wedding day.

_Santana got defensive and angry._

**Santana:** She is present. She is in my life. So drop it. I want her in the wedding and I want her walking.

_Leslie got really mad._

**Leslie:** Fine. Let me know when you want to get married.

_Leslie left the room mad at Santana. Santana sighed, she thought about going to find her but her phone's ring stropped her. She looked the screen and saw Brittany's smily face emerge. It was actually an old photo of Brittany from Santana's graduation from high school. Santana always thought that she'd never looked more gorgeous than that day. That day was also the first entirely sad and happy day at the same time of their lives together. She smiled and answered the phone._

**Santana:** Hey Britt Britt!

_**Brittany:**__ Hey, homegirl._

_Santana always hated Brittany calling her that. It was the way she chose to address her when she accepted to be friends again. It was Brittany's way to keep Santana at a distance. Santana always hated distance between them. And she will always hate it._

**Santana:** How are you feeling today? Wait it's really late at night there why aren't you sleeping?

_**Brittany: **__(She sighed) Ugh I'm stuck on this bed three days now. I always fall asleep. Besides I wanted to talk to you and I waited for you to get back from work._

**Santana:** Oh ok! Tell me, hon.

_**Brittany:**__ So I got to be discharged today! _

**Santana:** _(She screamed happily)_ Really? That's great! But wait! _(She panicked)_ Where are you going to go? Are you all alone there? Do you have anyone to help you? I told I should have come.

_**Brittany:**__ (She laughed) Relax, homegirl! Everything is okay. My tour manager is here. They are flying me back tomorrow._

**Santana:** Oh my god really? I mean really?

_**Brittany:**__ Yeah really! Why are you so excited?_

**Santana:** _(She was talking enthusiastically)_ What do you mean? Because you are coming back. And I'm going to see you, and spend time with you. I'm going to pamper you like crazy.

_**Brittany:**__ Ummm yeah… look… I'm not coming to NY…_

**Santana:** _(She froze)_ What?

_**Brittany:**__ I've decided to go straight back to Lima… ummm it's better…_

_Brittany kept her voice calm and still._

**Santana:** Better for who?

_**Brittany:**__ For me. Better for me. And eventually for you._

**Santana:** _(She yelled)_ Are you shitting me now too, Brittany?

_**Brittany:**__ Who else is shitting you?_

**Santana:** Leslie. You two are playing with me today.

_**Brittany:**__ (She got angry but kept talking calmly) Don't compare me with people, Santana. Don't even._

**Santana:** I didn't mean…

_**Brittany:**__ I'm going up to Lima. End of discussion._

**Santana:** _(She yelled again)_ Fuck!

_**Brittany:**__ You know it's for the best. I won't be able to walk for more than six months. Do you know what that means? I'll need help._

**Santana:** That's what I'm saying, Brittany. I won't to help you. Please, I want you to come here.

_**Brittany:**__ No. I'll be out of business for over a year. When was the last time you've spent so much time with me, Santana?_

**Santana:** My point exactly. How long I have to wait to be with you?

_**Brittany:**__ (She laughed) To be with me? You've got some nerve!_

**Santana:** You know what I mean.

_**Brittany:**__ Listen to me. You have a partner and a wedding to plan. I can stay in your place for three days but I can't move there for a year. I need to go to my home. And the only home I know now that still exists is Lima. So cut the crap and see how things really are. You are welcome to come and see me in Lima whenever you want._

**Santana:** This is your home too.

_**Brittany:**__ No it isn't, Santana. It stopped being long time ago. My stop is always three days in order to see you. But just to see you. Three days top. I can't be with you more than that._

_Santana started yelling again and Brittany now felt really angry._

**Santana:** Can you see it? Even after all those years you keep messing things up. You keep leaving me. _(She screamed)_ You've never loved me!

_Brittany paused and talked with even voice._

_**Brittany:**__ What did you say?_

**Santana:** _(She immediately regretted what she said.)_ Sorry!

_**Brittany:**__ Tell me what did you say._

**Santana:** I didn't mean it…

_**Brittany:**__ And people always thought I was the stupid one._

**Santana:** Brittany…

_**Brittany:**__ But yeah… they were right. I was the stupid one and you never stopped being the mean one._

_And with that Brittany hung up the phone. Santana fell on the couch and cried loudly. Leslie run to the living room alarmed and hugged Santana._

**Leslie:** What happened? What's wrong Santana?

_Santana buried herself in Leslie's embrace and cried._

**Leslie:** Talk to me. What's wrong?

**Santana:** Brittany… she isn't coming here to stay with us…. She's going back to Lima….

**Leslie:** _(She sighed)_ You scared me, Santana. Well can you blame her?

**Santana:** _(She pulled herself from her embrace)_ What do you mean now?

**Leslie:** She's going to be immobile for months. She needs her people to help her and treat her.

**Santana:** And I am not her people?

**Leslie:** Of course you are… but she can't stay here for a year.

_Santana stood up and looked angrily at Leslie._

**Santana:** And why not?

**Leslie:** Because here you are leaving with me.

**Santana:** So isn't there a place in this house for my best friend to stay?

**Leslie:** Yes, there is… for a few days. Not for the rest of her life. You are with me Santana, you have to understand it.

_Santana got red from her anger but she could decipher inside her what exactly made her so angry._

**Santana:** What are you talking about? I know that.

**Leslie:** You seem to forget it when Brittany is around. But now she's going to be around a lot more. So clear things in your head cause you are not going to like what I'm going to do if you don't.

**Santana:** Are you threading me?

**Leslie:** No. It wouldn't even work with you. I'm your partner, Santana. I'm your person. I'm the only constant thing in your life. You've been with me more than you've been with anyone and I know you better than anyone. I'm your life. Brittany is just a memory. She doesn't even exist in your life. Get over it.

_Santana felt the rage inside her. Everything was blurring. She wanted to leave the apartment before she did something that she was going to regret later._

**Santana:** Fuck you.

_She exited the apartment and slammed the door behind her. _


End file.
